weight tracker

Monday, November 22, 2010

food makes me feel sick :(


so weighed in at 126 even this morning. that's almost another pound down. just one more till i'm at my low weight of 125. but i mean..probably not going to get there for awhile, since i'm almost definitely going to gain over thanksgiving, and then it'll take some time to lose that weight back. but i will get there. i have to. 
so that accidental fast added up to over 60 hours of no food...i kinda feel guilty for it. like i'm out of control or something. it's different when i plan fasts, then i feel good about reaching the goal, but i just feel oddly...helpless. made myself eat about an hour ago. just like i promised i would. had a package of those apple slices from subway (35 cal). now i feel nauseous. it sucks. but i know i needed it. and i'm going to force more food down my throat later today too. maybe a salad and another apple or something. mentally i really really don't want to eat, but my body really has been freaking out a little bit, so i need to take care of myself. plus if i'm getting sick over like an apple then i really need to get my body used to food again or thanksgiving is going to be even worse than i imagined. idk. all i can do is try my best. i don't want to throw up, so i have to be careful not to push myself too hard.

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